Dear Gemma… {A Letter To Myself As A First Time Mummy} #VicksBabyRub Challenge*

Dear Gemma… {A Letter To Myself As A First Time Mummy} #VicksBabyRub Challenge*

Dear Gemma {circa 2010},

Congratulations, you are pregnant (and expecting a little girl). I know you weren’t planning to fall pregnant so quickly – and I certainly know that Ell was hoping to get in a bit more ‘practice’ first – after all you had only been married 3 months when you discovered you were going to be parents. Remember that day? Ell had told you to wait to take a pregnancy test until you missed your period, after all ‘how expensive!’ are those tests. Of course you snuck upstairs when he was mowing the lawn – one day you’ll both realise the sheer genius of artificial grass and it will change your life – and you took the test / tried not to pee on your hand.

Almost straight away it flashed up PREGNANT. You were so excited that you ran to the back window and threw the test out the window at him. You’ll never forget that moment, even when you are grey and old.

I know how excited you are, and you can’t wait for your perfect little girl to come along – right now the first thing you need to know is that she really is perfect. She will grow up to have the kindest heart, the most beautiful big brown eyes and a total flair for the dramatic. I know you are worried about whether you will do a good job, but trust me all those attributes I’ve just mentioned are all down to you both.

Labour – that won’t be easy – a three day induction followed by a back to back labour but in the end she will fly out in 15 minutes – what did I say about a flair for the dramatic?

First Photo

Nearly out of NICU

Finally Home

You’ll face challenges – that beautiful little girl will spend the best part of a week in NICU but she will be absolutely fine. There will be tears, from both of you – being discharged from the hospital and having to leave your baby there will feel like the worst feeling in the world at the time but she will soon be home with you, and everyone she meets will be besotted with her. She will wrap you around her little finger in the best possible way. In fact compared to what comes next, giving birth is the least of your worries.

You will worry about every single tiny thing – each time she sneezes, each sicky burp, and as she grows and starts to move, every bump and scrape. Trust me when I say everything will be ok. Worrying makes you a good mum, but don’t let that worry consume you.

That little girl will also become your strength, when in a couple of years you fall pregnant again, and find out you will be giving her a little sister. Sadly darling, life is cruel, and you will encounter the worst type of pain – that precious baby, the sister for your first born, the one you wished and hoped for, will be born sleeping. Your first born daughter will get you through the most incredible pain, because even though you feel you can’t carry on, you will for her. You will show her how strong you can be, even when your heart is breaking. 

First Proper Visit to the Park

We made a Ball Pit!

Those Eyes…

…and the most beautiful smile

You will show her how to have hope, and how sometimes after a storm, there will be the most beautiful rainbow – two in fact. You will go on to have the most beautiful boys two and a half years apart.

One day you will realise that even despite the lack of sleep, the dirty nappies and the constant fear that you aren’t doing it right, that you have grown a beautiful family and that being a Mum was everything you were ever supposed to be.

If I can give you a few pieces of advice, ones that will hold you in good stead for the years to come. Babies grow quickly – don’t waste money on little outfits, because as cute as they may be, they will either outgrow them quickly or ruin them with a poo explosion (particularly after you’ve just spent a fortune on fancy fish and chips on holiday in Padstow, which will end up in bin, along with the clothes as the poonami was just too big – yes, true story).

Also as grateful as you are for all of your babies, some days they will drive you round the bend – that first born of yours – as she gets older she will never stop talking or singing. It’s unlikely you’ll ever go to the loo alone again until they are at least at preschool – oh and be prepared that every time you make plans, one of them will come down with either 1. A cold 2. A sickness bug or 3. Chicken pox – those three weeks will be hell as all three kids will get it at once. On that note, always make sure you keep a large supply of things in the medicine cabinet, a thermometer, infant paracetamol, and teething granules. If you keep stocked up, you’ll never have to make an emergency run when your child is poorly in the night and you realise you’ve ran out (also a true story). In fact any younger siblings will probably spend the first year old their lives with a constant cold or cough after the eldest brings home ALL the germs from preschool. That or there will just be moments when they are unsettled, you’ll try everything and still won’t work out what is wrong. Sometimes they just want to cry.

Luckily there are genius products such as Vicks BabyRub to help with those unsettled times. Massaging your baby is well known to help bonding, and alongside Vicks Baby Rub,  will help to moisturise, soothe and help your baby feel relaxed. It is the first of its kind and is a multipurpose product providing moisturising & soothing comfort for delicate skin. It features mild fragrances of Rosemary, Lavender and Aloe Vera and is gentle enough for your baby’s routine, helping your baby feel calm and relaxed before they go to sleep – and also helping to soothe you as a parent too. It can be used at any time of the day to help to wind down and settle your baby, including After bath and before bedtime, during times when they are teething, before naps, when baby is poorly and unsettled, when they are overtired or overstimulated, or to help with a change in routine. Vicks BabyRub is a cosmetic, non-medicated product for babies aged six months and older but will be a god send when you need a bit of extra help with a overtired or poorly little one. 

In short, what you’ve got ahead of you will be so hard. Being a mother will challenge you in some way every day (whether that’s trying to get your child to eat their vegetables, referring a sibling squabble, making them do their homework or trying to locate the cuddly toy they can’t live without when it disappears). It will be hard, there will be blood (also don’t forget plenty of character plasters), sweat (you’ll never know the heat given off by a tiny little person with a temperature) and tears (also yours on those days where you just can’t wait for their Daddy to come home) but oh my god will it be worth it.

The one thing I can’t even begin to describe in words is the love you will feel for that little person. At this moment you are growing someone who you will love, and in return they will love you more than anyone in the whole world.

You’ll survive the hard days my darling, because the good days will outweigh them ten fold. The pride you will feel when someone compliments your child’s behaviour or when they write their name for the first time will be like nothing else.

Always remember, no matter how much you think you think you can’t do this in the years that follow, you’ve got this and you are doing an amazing job – try and tell yourself that every so often.

Enjoy every second, it really does go too fast.

Be kind to yourself,

Lots of Love

2018 Gemma {AKA yourself 8 years in the future}

P.S Please please please make the most of your maternity leave – lie in, watch reruns of F.R.I.E.N.D.S and enjoy going food shopping alone – in a few months from now you’ll probably not be able to hear yourself think again for a while!

P.P.S Toddler Tantrums in the supermarket SUCK! Just remember ‘this too shall pass’ and you’ll be just fine.

P.P.P.S don’t have blonde highlights and cut in a fringe – you’ll regret it and it’ll look like bird has pooed on your head! Not parenting related but just good life advice.

The Infamous ‘Bird Poo’ and Fringe Combo Hair

All my babies together

Rainbows after a storm

*This post is an entry for BritMums #VicksBabyRub Challenge, sponsored by Vicks BabyRub. Specially designed for babies aged 6 months and over, Vicks BabyRub is available at Boots, Superdrug, Tesco, Asda, Waitrose and all good pharmacy chains. RRP £3.99.



1 Comment

  1. March 18, 2018 / 6:15 pm

    It is amazing how much we learn along the way and I loved your tips for a first-time mum. Commenting for myself and on behalf of BritMums and thanking you for taking part

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